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Teaching Abstinence To Teenagers
According to a report, “Teens who
pledge to remain virgins until marriage are just as likely to have
premarital sex as those who do not promise abstinence…
“The new analysis of data from a
large federal survey found that more than half of youths became sexually
active before marriage regardless of any ‘virginity pledge.’
“Janet E. Rosenbaum of the Johns
Hopkins Bloomberg School of Public Health published the report, which
appears in the January issue of the journal Pediatrics.
“The study is the latest in a series
raising questions about programs that focus on encouraging abstinence
until marriage, including those that specifically ask students to
publicly declare their intention to remain virgins”
(Washington Post, January 4, 2009).
Well, then… I guess that settles it.
Let’s quit teaching abstinence to our children.
Pardon the sarcasm… and if you will,
permit a few comments.
To my knowledge, no one has ever
suggested that the reciting of a ’virginity pledge’ (like some magic
incantation) would keep one sexually pure. Obviously, the mere making of
a pledge isn’t enough. Other factors must be present.
Surely a teenager must give more than
lip service to the idea. He or she must, like the prophet Daniel, “purpose
in their heart” not to “defile” themselves. They must “settle it in
[their] minds… beforehand” that they will wait until marriage (Daniel
1:8; Luke 21:14).
As for these government-run programs: I,
for one, am not a proponent of ‘sex education’ in our schools. But as
long as our government insists on sponsoring such, I’d much prefer that
a teacher focus a student’s attention on the advantages of abstinence,
as opposed to focusing on the benefits of being properly ‘protected.’
The Bible says, “Flee sexual immorality” (1 Corinthians 6:18). That
sounds like abstinence.
PARENTS, however, are the ones who need
to be teaching and encouraging (and discouraging) their children in
these matters (Ephesians 6:4; Titus 2:3-5). God made parents, not some
state-run organization, to be the trainers of their children (Proverbs
29:15,17).
Parents are the ones who need to teach
their children about the proper use and stewardship of their bodies…
about purity… about the sin of sexual immorality (1 Corinthians 6:13).
Parents are the ones who need to be
watchful about the clothing (or lack thereof) they allow their children
to wear to school, the mall, or elsewhere (Romans 13:13). How some
fathers can allow their daughters to go out of the house in their
suggestive attire is beyond me.
Parents are the ones who need to keep a
close eye on who their children date… where their children go… what
their children are doing with their friends (1 Kings 1:6).
Parents are the ones who need to stop
allowing their children to watch sexually suggestive movies and
television programs.
Parents are the ones who need to plan
nights at home with their children, rather than allowing them to go to
some school dance or pool party (1 Peter 4:3).
Parents are the ones who themselves
need to be setting the example of sexual purity. (How many children
today are made to witness their parents’ adulterous wanderings?)
Frankly, it might be a good idea for a parent to solicit a ‘virginity
pledge’ from their child -- But what good will such do if the mother
and/or father isn’t practicing sexual purity?
LET’S JUST SET THE MATTER STRAIGHT. The
buck stops with the HOME as to who is largely responsible for the
fornication scourge among youths in our culture. Children don’t need
instruction about ‘protecting’ themselves and their partners in the act
of fornication. They need training in sexual purity, and it needs to
come from godly examples and instruction from their parents.
Simply put… Parents need to grow up and
be… parents.
--Mike Noble
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